Starting an au-pair adventure in China is exciting, especially if it’s your first time living abroad as an exchange-student, a high school student, or an international student. The first weeks can feel like a real cultural maze. You’re joining a host family, adapting to a new exchange program and student exchange programs, and learning how daily life works inside a Chinese home. What makes the difference between a stressful start and a smooth one? A clear orientation, the right placement, and good communication with your host parents and each family-member.
This article is a practical, cross-cultural guide for au pairs, youth exchange participants, foreign exchange student profiles, and anyone joining an international exchange or homestay program. It helps you understand what your first days should look like, what to expect regarding room and board, routines, and how to build a healthy relationship as a true member of the family. I’ll also compare a few points with the U.S. au pair model (regulated by the Department of State) so you can see what’s universal and what’s specific to China, whether you’re coming from different countries for a year abroad or a shorter educational travel stay.
1. Orientation: Your Real Starting Line
In any serious au pair program or student exchange programs, the first step is an orientation—a welcoming phase where expectations are clarified. In the U.S., agencies often run formal orientation camps and the Department of State sets standards. In China, orientation is usually organized by the agency and the host family, which means it can be more personal and flexible, but you still need structure. Think of it as your cultural handbook for go abroad life.
A good orientation should include:
- A full welcoming moment with the host parents, kids, and key family-member(s)
- A tour of the home and explanation of your private bedroom in your home stay
- Clear discussion of household house rules and schedules
- A breakdown of your role in child care services and daily routines
- Simple cultural tips about language and culture, school rhythm, etiquette, and how to avoid culture-shock
Orientation is your “cultural map.” You don’t need to know everything instantly, but you must know how to ask, who to ask, and what the family expects. Your local coordinator (if your program provides one) can also support you during this phase.
2. Placement: Choosing the Right Host Family Fit
Your placement is not just about the city or the salary. It’s about lifestyle and immersion. A good match makes the program rewarding; a bad match makes everything harder. Masons Au Pair focuses on placements where au pairs and exchange students are treated like part of the family—not like staff. This is true whether you’re doing a high school program, a gap-year abroad, or combining au pair with an intern experience later.
When evaluating a placement, ask about:
- The number and age of children (are there siblings?)
- Who lives at home (parents only, or grandparents too?)
- Past experience with au pairs, high school students, or international students
- Daily schedule: school-year rhythm, weekdays vs weekends, and campuses nearby
- The family’s expectations for English-speaking practice and cultural exchange
Most importantly: does the family see you as a cultural exchange partner, or only as childcare help? You want a family that values your home-country culture as much as you value theirs.
3. Room and Board: What “Living With a Host Family” Really Means
Like in the American model, au pairs in China receive room and board. That means your accommodation and meals are covered by the host family. But culturally, “living with a host family” in China can feel more collective than in the West. Homes are active, family-members are present, and routines are shared. This is a real homestay style experience—your home away from home.
Typical features:
- Your own private bedroom (essential for rest and personal space)
- Shared meals almost every day
- Regular family time in the evening
- Strong involvement of grandparents in childcare in many homestays
In some homes, grandparents are key family-members who will interact with you daily. This is normal in China and often a beautiful part of the experience—especially for youth exchange and Rotary youth exchange style participants.
4. Stipend, Spending Money, and Daily Life Costs
Au pairs receive a monthly stipend or spending money. It’s not a salary in the corporate sense—it’s pocket money to support your personal expenses while your core needs are covered through room and board. Some exchange students receive per week support from their programs too.
Your stipend is typically used for:
- Public transport, cafés, or weekend trips
- Personal shopping and hobbies
- Extra snacks or meals outside the family home
- Optional travel abroad inside China during your year abroad
Because your biggest expenses are already covered, the stipend goes further than many people expect. This is why so many au pairs describe the experience as rewarding rather than financially stressful.
5. Chores, Childcare, and Boundaries
Every au pair helps with child care. But families may also ask for light chores linked to the children—like tidying play areas or preparing simple snacks. The key is clarity. Think of it as child-focused housework, not full household cleaning.
Your responsibilities should focus on:
- Playing with children, homework support, routines
- Helping with meals or snacks for kids
- Child-related chores only (not full-house cleaning)
If you feel something is outside your role, don’t stay silent. The best way is to communicate with your host parents kindly but directly. Most issues come from assumptions, not bad intentions. A counselor from your agency can also help if needed.
6. Language Courses, ESL, and Cultural Exchange
Many Masons Au Pair participants take language courses or join a language school for Mandarin. This is a huge part of the experience—especially if you want to improve proficiency fast. Families also love when au pairs bring their own culture into the home. If you’re doing ESL teaching, you’ll often be asked to support English-speaking confidence in daily life (Esl).
Great cultural exchange habits:
- Teach kids small phrases from your home-country
- Share games or music you loved as a child
- Cook a simple meal from your culture together
- Talk about what’s different in school or family life
This is how you make new friends, build cross-cultural comfort, and create lifelong memories—on both sides.
7. Safety, Screening, Application Process, and Student Visa
Every reputable agency checks safety carefully. In the U.S., the au pair system requires strict background checks through the Department of State. In China, Masons Au Pair follows a similarly serious application process with screening on both sides. You will be screened, and host families are screened too.
Expect parts of the process like:
- A clear criminal background check before final placement
- Full application fill-out with your experience and goals
- Guidance for your student visa or program visa
- Sharing contact-information for emergency and travel needs
- Agreement on schedule and responsibilities before you arrive
This protects you and the host family, and creates trust from day one—like a real Host international standard in international programs. Some applicants even come through recognized channels like Rotary youth exchange or other youth exchange networks; a few European students also discover China after programs linked to institutions such as the Bundestag scholarship community.
8. Building a Strong Relationship With Your Host Mother and Family
In many Chinese homes, the host mother is the main coordinator of childcare and daily life. She may be the one giving you instructions, checking progress, or reminding you of schedules. This isn’t about control—it’s cultural and practical. Your role is to become a trusted member of the family.
How to keep things smooth:
- Confirm tasks clearly, especially during the school-year routine
- Send a quick message when plans change
- Ask questions early instead of guessing
- Share positive updates about the kids
Small daily communication builds a real “family feeling.” You’re not just a visitor—you’re part of the household.
9. Homestay Life, Travel Abroad, and Culture Shock
Some au pairs come with a Western idea of independence, often shaped by American culture or study-abroad experiences. In China, a homestay is more collective: family meals, shared schedules, more check-ins, and stronger involvement in children’s education. It’s pure immersion, and yes, you may feel culture-shock at first.
That’s normal. The goal is not to “act Chinese”—it’s to live respectfully in a foreign country, understand the logic, and enjoy the experience as a true cultural exchange program. Over time, it becomes your home away, your family abroad, and your strongest learning space.
10. For Host Families: Being a Host in China
If you’re reading this as a parent, know that being a host is also a journey. Many Chinese families choose to host international students or au pairs to create a cross-cultural home, expose children to English-speaking environments, and give kids a global mindset without leaving their campuses.
Host families usually gain:
- A new family-member who supports childcare and language exchange
- Children who develop intercultural confidence early
- Long-term international friendships and new friends abroad
- A structured homestay program supported by local coordinators
If you want to become a host or learn more about hosting international participants, Masons Au Pair provides a clear handbook and full guidance for host families.
Conclusion
A strong start in China depends on three things: a clear orientation, a thoughtful placement, and open communication. When you understand your stipend, room and board, childcare role, house rules, application process, and what living with a host family truly means, your experience becomes not only smooth but truly rewarding.
The goal of the Masons Au Pair exchange program is simple: help au pairs, exchange-students, and international student profiles grow through language and culture, enjoy a year abroad, travel abroad safely, and create lifelong memories in China with their host families.
If you’re ready to start your journey, explore our latest placements—or if you’re a parent thinking about being a host—Masons Au Pair is here to guide you at every step.